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Dan and Kevin’s Fearless Forecasts-1933

                                                       

     



   Here we go again, another installment of the wonderful musings by Everything's better with Bacon Media Group' & freelance writer who has no regard for anyone's personal feelings.


*Disclaimer* None of the musings and meanderings of an otherwise unorthodox left handed dreamer is based in reality or facts. ...or are they?


MLB/NGL 1933 Season Averages


Batting .270/.330/.377/.707 ops


Pitching 4.55 era, 12.4 R/9



AMERICAN LEAGUE:


Gashouse Gorillas


Batting -  They are not quite the prominent offense of yesterday but they are well above average for 1933. Paul Waner could be 1 to watch this season.  B+


Pitching - They could have 1 of the stronger bullpens depending on if the top arms that have limited innings start or relieve.  C



Jersey City Skeeters


Batting - Kevin is still the boss around here folks, even though he's never won his own league. Maybe Adam, it's time to let your Dad pick the dinner menu for his own Birthday?  B


Pitching - Maybe not on the flashy side of the bump but the Skeeters won't be swatted too hard this season, they bolster 1 of the best pitching staffs in the entire league from top to bottom.. B+/A-



Mudville Nine


Batting - Not many teams can claim their best bat is a SS in this hitting environment but Brent managed to pull that off.  C+/B-


Pitching - If the Nine were called four do you think people would be missing the fairway a lot? Fore!  D



Georgia Pines


Batting -  Apparently the clubhouse manager got let go, he bought Babe filtered's, ruined his mojo. It is difficult to have a well balanced offense but Georgia may have enough top heaviness to notbe bothered by the doldrums of their opponents 7-9. B+


Pitching - Dean is here and he's looking to lock up some hardware. With those top bats Dean could very well hold down a 25+ win season. C+



Vegas Vipers


Batting - Wally Berger & Oscar Charleston will be a hell of a combo to combat the Pines 1-2 punch. The problem extends from the fact that besides that, they quickly run out of fuel for the fire. C-


Pitching - Huck Betts, Fitzsimmon, & 'ol Grove, it's your time to carry this team to a WS defense, don't embarrass Doug!  C



Nova-Scotia Miners


Batting -  We're still mining, we're just changing minerals. What we aren't mining for is offense, because well, we're out.  D


Pitching - I hope the air isn't thinner in Nova-Scotia, that ball doesn't need to do anymore traveling.  D



Indianapolis Racers


Batting - The Racers are the cream of the offensive crop in this league this year. Sure there’s opponents pitching staffs & ball park factors but on paper, they are the SCL 1933 Runs Scored leader.  B+


Pitching - They have a quality top half of their staff that could potentially take them further than anticipated. Terry is not just a pretty radio face.  B



Flint Vehicles


Batting - Is it ironic that this team is called the vehicles? As they are the slowest moving team on earth.   B-


Pitching - Marberry, the legend continues, basically 1st ballot HOFer. Hunter is a candidate to over perform the peripherals, watch him.  D+/C-




AL Standings Projection:


Jersey City Skeeters


Indianapolis Racers


Georgia Pines


Gashouse Gorillas


Vegas Vipers


Flint Vehicles


Mudville Nine


Kenmore Miners



*Notes* Could this be Kevin's year to finally get a Christmas present from Adam worth a damn? Racers are very solid but their track record is too unproven to go full on #1.




National League:



Wheaton Warbirds


Batting - Josh Gibson is widely considered the best hitter in the NL especially in Mr. Foxx's friend circle. They should quite easily attain the best offense in the NL this season. B+


Pitching -Hubbell & that offense, that guy could win 30 games.  Solid up & down, going to be a tough year for the Warbirds competition.   B




Peoria Caterpillars


Batting - There's been a rumor running rampant in the Peoria Times that Mr. Herman has lost his mind, Last week an 'ol lady walking down the street walked passed upon which the nice old bag said hello, to which the reply was quoted as saying 'I hate candy bars' I think the fact that his last name isn't Ruth is really starting to bother him. C/C+


Pitching - Foster is yet again an ace on paper, does he bring the team further along by himself?!   C



Queen City Baseball Club


Batting - 'Ol Johnny Cochrane hell of a defender, defense attorney, I mean catcher? 3 strikes in bowling is called a Turkey, you think Mr. Stearnes was a kingpin?  B-


Pitching - A bit understated but Bush is an ace, is he up to the challenge of that label?   C-



Baltimore Terrapins


Batting - Looking for a rebound after a tough family loss started a hockey a team , with names like Lindstrom, Lazzeri, Finner, & Manush at least that's what we assumed he did..  C-


Pitching - 3 above average starting pitchers, oh Jimmy has a shiny lure, or was that what the locker room rumor was? B+



Panhandle Artesian Wells


Batting - The water has breached the surface! This team will be in the top 1/3 of offense in the SCL this year. Massive improvements, way to go!  B+


Pitching - Hal is another Bush type pitcher, they have potential to be great but the makeup of their #s sometimes DMB doesn't play kindly.  C



Custers Crimson Tide


Batting - Worst thing to happen in our SCL tenure, losing the WS? Nope done that a few times. Having to trade Oscar Charleston. By chance you can't pass on cornerstones in a draft, selecting Hank Greenberg forced management to move Oscar in an MVP 1933 caliber season and hamper the Tide's ability to get back to the playoffs this season. Insult, Oscar goes to the Vipers who just BEAT the Tide in the 1932 WS.  C-



Pitching - Projected to be a dominant pitching staff, the addition of Streeter was big. Can you win when the offense runs stagnant?  A-



Sunderland Storm


Batting - What's that song in the 60's, was it 'Turn the Page'? Their fans scream for the love of God to bring up Page again. D


Pitching - My man Satch, 9k's per 9 ip, you freak! Tim will be busy moving pitchers around all season as there is not much for full season arms.   B



Willoughby Starlings


Batting - Who puts the star in the Starlings? Gehringer by wide public opinion polling. This team should over perform its numbers because they are about 6 bats deep even if Suttles is not so hot. B-



Pitching - Maylock looks to be eyeing an AS appearance this season. Very competent staff overall.  B-/B



NL Standings Projection:


Wheaton Warbirds


Willoughby Starlings


Panhandle Artesian Wells


Baltimore Terrapins


Peoria Caterpillars


Sunderland Storm


Custers Crimson Tide


Queen City Baseball Club   




*Notes* The curse of Oscar Charleston will haunt me forever. Warbirds & the Starlings will most likely battle for 1st all season long, the 3rd seed could easily be 3-4 teams.




 



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                                                                            1933 SCL Preview


     I picked the Vipers to win it all in 1929, 30, and 31; under performing each season, losing horribly, and making me look bad.  I dropped them like a bad habit in 1932, and they won it all. Just like I planned. Reverse prediction psychology: picking a team to fail, while playing mind games on Doug, so that he would finally get that long elusive SCL Championship.  You’re welcome, Doug. Now go away, rest on your laurels, give someone else a chance. Is laurel resting still a thing? What is a laurel, and why do winners rest on them? Who cares? Find a laurel Doug (I shouldn’t have to do all the work) and rest on it, you deserve it Doug.


It’s time for V and John Momberg to step up and win their 1st SCL Championship. I believe they both previously took their respective teams to the World Series, only to get destroyed by my Skeeters. I make no apologies.

Do the PAWS and the Caterpillars have what it takes to win it all this season? Let’s see, shall we.


AMERICAN LEAGUE


Jersey City Skeeters: GM-Kevin Graham


My wife was recently a victim of identity theft. Her Visa Card was hacked and a whole bunch of stuff was charged on her account. I noticed whoever was using it charged way less than my wife did, so I never reported it. I’m saving a bundle.


The Skeeters have some quality on offense. Bell, Simmons, and Dixon are back, giving them a pretty good OF.

Shortstop Jake Dunn, and 3rd baseman Pepper Martin have All-Star potential. Rip Collins is one of many very good 1st basemen in the SCL, and Sam Bankhead is a very good 2-way player this season.


Otis Starks, Dolf Luque, and Reggie Grabowski are 3 solid relievers. Charlie Root, Bankhead, Parmalee, and Powell look strong. If the pitching performs to their real-life numbers, this staff is pretty good.



Gashouse Gorillas: GM- Ryan Buckley


Ryan recently moved into a new house. His other house burned down. When the smoke alarm went off one morning, Ryan hit the snooze button.


Jud Wilson and George Scales have the most potent bats, but only in a part-time role. Lefty O’Doul struggles this season. Paul Waner will probably be the only Gorilla to play every game. Ryan will have to mix and match at most positions.


Red Ruffing, Pat Malone, and Skeeter cast off Ed Wells are the only full-time starters on this squad. Ed Wells as a #3 starter doesn’t bode well. The rest of the staff is full of bode as well. This is not a pitching staff that has playoff talent.



Georgia Pines: GM- Joe Clark


Joe is kind of an adventure seeker. He recently took a chance and bought an off-road vehicle on Ebay. They sent him a canoe. When you get lemons……….put wheels on a canoe, and find the steepest hill. His arm will come out of the cast in 3 weeks.


Ruth,  Gehrig and Ott could out homer 7 teams in the league. The rest of the team….not so much. Intentional walks might come into play….a lot.


Dizzy Dean and Rick Derringer are pretty good. Ed Holley and General Crowder, are acceptably average. Excepting Charlie Beverly, the rest of the staff doesn’t approach middling.



Mudville Nine: GM- Brent Porter


Like most of us, Brent suffers from male pattern baldness. He tried to hide it with a comb-over. Turns out using nose hair for a comb-over is against company policy, so he had to trim it down.


The Nine’s leading hitter is Jabbo Andrews. He will probably lead the Nine in HRs. Unfortunately Jabbo will burn out around the 60 game mark. Coincidentally, Jabbo is Arabic for “loses often”, which perfectly describes the prediction for this team. Arky Vaughn, Ben Chapman and Frankie Frisch are a nice group of ball players. They won’t stop the jabbo awaiting this team.


The pitching staff has 2 HOFers. Burleigh Grimes and Dazzy Vance both of which haven’t pitched like HOFers, and I don’t see that changing this season. They could combine for 12 wins, the rest of this staff, nothing but jabbo.



Indianapolis Racers: GM- Terry Baxter


Terry had a German shepherd puppy named Adolph. (Not the best choice of a name, but who am I to judge?) He died recently after drinking a whole bottle of furniture polish. It was a horrible ending….but a beautiful finish.  


Jimmie Foxx is a “Beast” once again. He won’t hit 60 HRs, but he should still lead the league. Luke Appling and Pinky Higgins are All-Stars. They have 2 left-hand batters named Campbell.  That could lead to confusion that many teams couldn’t overcome. The Racers have plenty of talent to overcome it.


Brandt, French, Harder, and Handley could start every game this season for the Racers. As they should. If it were up to me, I’d give it a shot.



Vegas Vipers: Doug Slothower


Like most of us, Doug is getting older, and can’t do some of the things that he used to. As a teacher, in his younger days, Doug used to like nothing better that cracking heads of pre-pubescent teenage boys. I’m right there with you big guy. There’s a certain form of satisfaction you can’t get anywhere else when you make them cry.


 If you take the acquisition of Oscar Charleston, and throw in Wally Berger, you have yourself a cookout. Not a very good cookout. No condiments, the steaks are burned, and you run out of burgers half way through. Even the ants don’t show up, because there’s just not enough food. This is not the 1932 Vipers’ offense.


Fitzsimmons, Grove, Stewart and Betts make for a top group of starting pitchers. They need to start and finish every game, because the bullpen is empty.



Nova Scotia Miners: GM- Matthew Schultz


Matt suffers from bunions. He saw on Facebook that spraying your feet with WD-40 will get rid of the bunions. Needless to say, he went downhill fast.


The Miners’ ball club snuck out of town in the dead of night and moved to Nova Scotia, nobody cared. “Don’t let Niagara Falls hit you in the ass on the way out.” That seemed to be the majority consensus opinion of the people in Kenmore. The SCL is now multi-national, so we have that going for us.


Sam Leslie and Johnny Vergez are their best hitters. They could combine to hit .280 with 20+ HRs. Throw in the Canadian exchange rate, and it’s more like .250 with a dozen Hrs.


Lefty Gomez has been known to have a nasty temper.  I wonder how that will come across in French-Canadian.



Flint Vehicles: GM- Chris Canaan


Chris is a thrill seeker. Cliff diving, bungee jumping, climbing Mt Everest. You name it, he’s done it. The only time he’s ever been hurt was when he took up the sport of “Talking back to his wife.” Don’t worry, his rehab is coming along great. He should be able to comb his own hair in a couple of weeks.


Bill Terry, Ducky Medwick, Joe Cronin, Pie Traynor, Goose Goslin, Lloyd Waner, and Sam Rice are all HOFers. That’s 7 HOFers!! (I double-checked on a calculator) Unfortunately for the Vehicles, none of these guys are having a HOF season.


Firpo Mayberry is pretty good and……..looking…….looking…..I’m not seeing any other pitchers. Bert Hunter is listed with 25 wins and 200 K’s. Both monstrous numbers, but his WHIP is 1.501. That’s monstrous as well, but in a negative way. He will be fortunate not to lose 20.


1. Racers- The “Beast” will feast

2. Skeeters- Pitching needs to perform

3. Pines- Ruth, Gehrig, and Ott need to shine

4. Gorillas- Too many bit players on offense

5. Vipers- resting on laurels

6. Nine- Jabbo from top to bottom

7. Vehicles- out of gas

8. Miners-It’s going to be cold in Canada


The Skeeters beat the Pines. The Racers beat the Skeeters in the ALCS



NATIONAL LEAGUE


Queen City Baseball Team: GM- Joe Combs


Joe recently got remarried, for the fourth time.  It’s not a surprise that most of the people he invited to the wedding, RSVP’d “I’ll catch you next time.”


Turkey Stearnes has MVP type stats, and Mickey Cochrane will take second fiddle after Josh Gibson as the league’s best catcher. But so will the rest of the league. The rest of the offense smells of Old Spice. It’s nice, but the chicks don’t really dig it like the commercials lead you to believe.


Guy Bush is pretty good. The rest of the staff consists of a Boom-Boom, a Flint, a Snipe, a Socks, and a Belve. There’s a porno in there somewhere. They may not have a lot of  pitching, but there’s a potential for lots of boom-boom..




Panhandle Artesian Wells: GM- V


V served in the military. His dad was also in the military, and V moved around a lot as a kid. He had to, his dad was using him for target practice.


Bill Dickey and Chick Hafey should have been Skeeters. Bob Johnson will hit some dingers, and the rest of the guys, should smack around a lot of extra base hits.


The pitching staff is iffy. Schumacher, Bridges, Hallahan, and Sorrell will rack up some quality innings, but the relief pitching is sparse……and iffy.



Custer’s Crimson Tide: GM-Dan Bacon


I haven’t picked on Dan once in this preview. I guess I just feel sorry for him. I mean, he’s Dan Bacon. Isn’t that punishment enough?


Oscar Charleston has been traded. What little respect I had for Dan Bacon is now gone. Hank Greenberg is the new 1st baseman for the Tide. He’s going to wish he was traded. This offense lacks power, guys that can get on base, and Oscar Charleston.  A trifecta of mismanagement.


At least the Tide got Sam Streeter, but even that won’t make up for the loss of Charleston. Although Ray Brown, Jim Willis, and some Mangum should ease the pain.


Baltimore Terrapins: GM- Jimmy Keenan


Jimmie was arrested as a toddler, while attempting to steal a pack of cigarettes. Check that, he was dressed as a toddler while attempting to steal cigarettes. That had to be embarrassing.


Heinie Manush, Freddie Lindstrom and Tony Lazzeri will not be able to carry the rest of this anemic offense. Joe Sewell strikes out just 4 times in 600 Pas. Impressive, but that doesn’t drive in any runs.


Lon Warneke, Van Lingle Mungo, Earl Whitehill, and Bill Swift lead a surprisingly solid pitching staff. Let’s hope they can also hit.


Peoria Caterpillars: GM- John Momberg


John had a lonely childhood, nobody liked him. When he joins us on line during the playoffs you can kind of see why. You immediately pick up the reason why when he throws a boomerang, it refuses to return to him.


Earl Averill, Buddy Myer, and Babe Herman, are the top dogs of this offense. The rest are just the runts of the litter. They get in the way trying to reach that ever elusive teat, ultimately ending on some Chinese buffet. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll eat it, it’s just sad that it’s not a cat.


Willie Foster, Fred Frankhouse and Tex Carelton will battle over who loses the most 2-1 ball games.



Wheaton Warbirds: GM- Adam Graham


Adam broke his ankle playing basketball. It was arcade basketball at a Chuckie Cheese. That’s embarrassing, but it could have been worse. He could have been playing Corn Hole.


Josh Gibson and Chuck Klein are the best 1-2 punch in the league. Last season it seemed like DMB sat Gibson out 2 out of every 5 games played. That can’t happen this season. There’s a huge drop off of talent after these 2 guys, obviously. They’re all fine hitters, but opposing pitchers should probably intentionally walk Gibson and Klein to get to the drop off guys.


If Adam could figure out how to run a 3 man rotation with Hubbell, Radcliffe, and another guy, they should be pretty good. The problem is the other guys are all innings challenged.



Sunderland Storm: GM- Tim Deale


Tim was a roadie for the Grateful Dead back in the 70’s.  He was in charge of Jerry Garcia’s microphone placement, and the maintenance of Jerry’s bong.  He learned a lot, and was always willing to guide the new guys on tour. He always led off with, “Never drink the bong water boys, not even on a dare.”


Tim always seems to be able to top himself with a team that hits less home runs than the previous season.  This season they also don’t provide many hits of any kind. They have some speed, they’ll need to use it to score any runs.


Take away Satchel Paige and his 200 dominant innings, and all this team is left with is a whole lot of not much.



Willoughby Starlings: David Kuehn


Dave has been going through a tough time recently. He’s been going to see a therapist since his wife died. I get it, snapping someone’s neck must have been very traumatic for both of them. (Did I cross a line there? I feel like I might have. Let me know in the comments.)


Catcher Spud Davis is their best hitter. All the rest are just mashed potatoes with not enough beef. As the world’s greatest Russian born spokes-person Clara Peller said, “Where’s the beef?” Jim Bottomley and Mule Suttles are both below average. Alex Radcliffe and Charlie Gehringer need to step up for this offense to succeed.


Cantwell, Carter, Meinie, and Matlock should be sent out every 4 days, and do their best to throw a CG. The rest of the staff is beefless.



1. PAWS- Why not.

2. Warbirds- Will need to juggle the lineup, and the rotation to succeed.

3. Terrapins/Tide/Starlings- all equally flawed

6.    QC/Storm/Caterpillars- all equally more flawed.


The Warbirds sweep whoever they play, the PAWS beat the Warbirds.


The Racers and PAWS face off in the 1933 World Series.