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 1922 SCL Season Previews by Dan Bacon and Kevin Graham

    

    

  

Another installment of the pure genius by 'Everything's better with Bacon Media Group'.

 AMERICAN LEAGUE:

Gashouse Gorillas

Batting - Oh Man you got Ken Williams he will lead the league in Home.....oh wait n/m.  C+/B-

Pitching - If the batter closes their eyes when facing Rip Collins does it increase the chances of a walk?. C-

Jersey City Skeeters

Batting - It seems as though Kevin is having trouble paying health insurance so he's keeping the full timers to a minimum.  C

Pitching - May Bill the Force be with you always. C

Shamokin Stogies

Batting - Is the combo of Torriente & McNair enough?  B

Pitching - It doesn't seem the WS magic lives in the pitching staff this year, its not bad it's just meh, like most staffs.. C/C+

Georgia Pines

Batting - Screw Ken Williams.... A+

Pitching - Does it really matter whose on the mound when you can score 10 runs a game? They could probably just throw the peanut vendors or the local harlots in the streets and still win. C-

Vegas Vipers

Batting - They will surely score some runs, will it be playoff worth numbers?. B+

Pitching - Hampton could contend for the pitcher of the year award..   C

Kenmore Miners

Batting - The 3 B's  - Ben, Beckwith, & Blackwell A-

Pitching - Padron is back in full effect and so are the Miners. Darn good squad. B+/A-

Heartland Comets

Batting - Moore, what a sick SS!  C-

Pitching - They continue to improve yet just not quite ready, that keck is a prick.. C-

Cooperstown Giants

Batting - Remember that movie 'little giants'? Well, they're still little. D

Pitching - Sadly, Bush won't sniff 26 wins this season. D

AL Standings Projection:

Kenmore Miners

Georgia Pines

Shamokin Stogies

Vegas Vipers

Gashouse Gorillas

Jersey City Skeeters

Heartland Comets

Cooperstown Giants

*Notes* How much life can the Miners manipulate out of their stockpile, can they yet take 1st from the Pines for the 2nd season in a row? The Gorillas, Stogies, & Vipers are all potential sleepers.

NATIONAL LEAGUE:

Wheaton Warbirds

Batting - Certainly the best offense in the NL. This is an impressive team in 1922 for sure!. A

Pitching - In a seriously diminished pitching season the Warbirds impress. They will be the best staff in the entire league. A

Peoria Caterpillars

Batting - Tobin is a quality piece just pales in comparison to the studs taking up spots in other lineups these days.. C

Pitching - Expected to be retooling yet after a seriously long winded contending run. C-

Arklatex Robins

Batting - Warfield the gift that keeps on scoring runs.   C

Pitching - Bill Holland should be consistent quality, this staff is incredibly lefty heavy, from my DMB experience, not a good idea..  C-

Baltimore Terrapins

Batting - What a group again Jimmy, what the heck!. B+-

Pitching - No WS hangover, they may not have an extreme ace (most teams don't) but they have the depth to contend yet again.  B

Pilot Point Aggies

Batting - Do you prefer Meusel or Meusel? C

Pitching - Seems like Cockrell will give Shawkey some competition for the best starter on their staff. .  C

Custers Crimson Tide

Batting - Oscar & Cobb we trust in you, may you not fail us (seriously butts in seats keep the food sales up). A-

Pitching - Herman Pillette, you guys know him don't act like you don't, perennial driftwood finally shows up. Our hope is in you Doc Sykes, aim small, miss small. B+

Sunderland Storm

Batting - Eddie Collins keeps on keeping on. C+/B-

Pitching - Trending in the right direction they'll be in the top 1/3 of the NL.  C+

Dyersville Dreamers

Batting - Way to go Dave! This team will have some muscle this year.  C-/C

Pitching - Much improved, they may not be in the playoff race but at year 3, the Dreamers are moving on up. C+

NL Standings Projection:

Wheaton Warbirds

Custers Crimson Tide

Baltimore Terrapins

Sunderland Storm

Arklatex Robins

Peoria Caterpillars

Dyersville Dreamers

Pilot Point Aggies

*Notes* Wheaton is a powerhouse this season, the Warbirds will likely walk to 1st place in the NL unscathed.

Kevin’s 1922 SCL Season Preview

 I think it was MacBeth that said,  Running a Historical Baseball Simulation ... is a task
run by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”

   This rings true. Can you hear the BELL ring? The feeling of hopelessness rings true, anger, anxiety, depression all ring true. Can you hear the BELL ring? So if all these things ring true without me even trying, how come I can’t figure out how to change the ring tone on my phone? It sounds like 2 cats getting it on in a back alley. It sounds like Roseanne singing the National Anthem. At this point I’d settle for the opening bars of “It’s Raining Men”…..halleluiah!!

   But I digress. I think the only way to get out of my well-earned commissioners funk is to take it out on every GM in the league, while also making my predictions. I don’t want to piss anyone off, I just need to purge my hopelessness, anger, anxiety, depression, and my god-awful ringtone by taking it out on you guys. Can you hear the BELL ring?

   Shakespeare is the master of the insult. When he wrote, “Me think’st thou art a general offence and every man should beat thee.” in A Midsummer Night’s Dream back in 1595, them’s were fighting words. But unfortunately if I were to say that line today in my best Shakespearean accent, it almost sounds like a compliment. But, I’m going to misuse the Bard for my purge and predictions anyway, maybe I’ll feel better when I’m done.

AMERICAN LEAGUE:

SKEETERS:   (Kevin G.)

“A most notable coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.”

All’s Well That Ends Well

Yep, that sounds like the Skeeters “no one good quality”. Tillie Walker is poised to hit 30 HRs, but he has been a massive disappointment for the Skeeters, and I expect that to continue. I went into the draft with only 4 pitchers, and came out with just 3. I’m not sure how that happened, but I did get HR Baker, Pete Hill and John Donaldson. I expect if Walker hits, that the Skeeters may score some runs, but the pitching is rank, and that smells like 90+ losses for the Skeeters.

GORILLAS:  (Ryan Buckley)  

“The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes.”

The Comedy of Errors

Ken Williams, Hack Miller, and long-time Gorilla Jake Daubert should put up some nice numbers, and they don’t have the worst pitching staff in the AL, but you can’t spell playoffs without W-I-N-S.

PINES:  (Joe Clark)

 “That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years?”

Henry IV

They failed to make the World Series last season after winning the previous two, so Joe Clark is pissed. You don’t want to be standing on the tracks when that truck comes …..I mean, you don’t want to be driving that truck when the train…..whatever the saying is, you don’t want that!

Ruth has a down year, (for him) but Hornsby, Johnson, Bigbee, Wesley, and yes Ruth will make opposing pitchers cry like 2 cats banging in an alley. Their pitching is suspect, but it might be hard to lose a lot of games when you score in double digits every game.

STOGIES: (Dave Nemec)

 “Thine face is not worth sun burning.”

Henry V   (That one makes me laugh.)

McNair and Torriente will provide much of the pop, and his pitching is better than most, but will that be enough to cut down the Pines, and bury the Miners? 3rd place is doable….unlike Roseanne.

COMETS:  (Rich Wright)  

“Thou clay-brained guts, thou knotty-pated fool, thou whoreson obscene greasy tallow-catch!”

Henry IV

There’s a comet flying by the Earth as I type this that will probably score more runs than this team. Lucky for the Comets, and unfortunately for me, that line doesn’t work here. Moore, Kelly and Jacobson are primed to have decent seasons, so scoring runs might not be a problem. Hoyt, Meyers, and Gisentaner make for a pretty nice starting 3. The rest of the staff may disappoint. If it was me I’d go with a 3 man rotation. Of course I type this while wearing Hello Kitty earrings, and Teletubbie underwear, so what do I know?

VIPERS:  ( Doug Slothower)  

“Thou art a boil, a plague sore”

King Lear

George Sisler should become the 1st SCL player to hit .400 in a season. George Johnson and Zack Wheat provide the power. I just don’t think the rest of the offense will be of help. Sam Streeter and Lewis Hampton could put up some numbers, as well as Isidro Fabre, but the rest of the staff will be a poor imitation of major league pitching.  

MINERS: (Mike Murphy)

“Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog!”

Richard III  (I may use that one at my next Ops meeting. I just need to find the right moment.)

Taylor, Beckwith, Blackwell and Carey will all get 200 hits and score 100 runs. Padron, Rommell, Luque, and Cooper are the best starting 4 in the AL. Playoffs are a lock……..winning them is another story. The Miners are the Buffalo Bills of the SCL. Always the best man, never the groom. So close yet so far. A day late and a dollar short. Close but no cigar. Success always seems to be in their hands and it slips through their fingers along with all their hopes and dreams. I see 95 wins and bone-crushing defeat in your future…..enjoy!  PS.... No button for you!!

GIANTS: (George Glavas)

 “Thou art unfit for any place but hell.”

Richard III

I look up and down this lineup and I see wins in the future, not this season, but sometime soon. Goslin and Traynor will have something to say about that. Bullet Joe Bush may use that bullet to put an end to his misery. He is a lock for 20 losses this season. Anything less than 100 losses will be a victory for the Giants. 7th place in the AL???? Not this season.

Pines

Miners

Stogies

Comets

Vipers

Gorillas

Skeeters

Giants

Miners beat the Stogies in the Wild Card, Pines sweep the Miners.

NATIONAL LEAGUE:

ROBINS: (V)  

“Thou sodden-witted lord! Thou hast no more brain than I have in mine elbows “

Troilus and Cressida

This team has potential, potential to finish 5th in the NL.  A so-so offense teamed up with a pretty good pitching staff, but pitching alone will not get you into the top 3. If it was up to me (and maybe it is) I’d run out a 3 man rotation of Mogridge, Redding, and Holland and hope for the best. But then again I was dropped on my head a few times as an infant, and as a toddler, as well as an adult, so I might not be thinking clearly.

AGGIES: (Robert McMeen)

 “You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe!”

Henry IV

The Aggies hung around in playoff contention in 1921 but faded fast in the last quarter of the season. The Meusel brothers, and Clint Thomas supply the power, and the pitching is led by Reuther, Shawkey, Ryan and Cockrell. Could the Aggies sneak up on 3rd place??

CRIMSON TIDE:  (Dan Bacon)

 

“You starvelling, you eel-skin, you dried neat’s-tongue, you bull’s-pizzle, you stock-fish–O for breath to utter what is like thee!-you tailor’s-yard, you sheath, you bow-case, you vile standing tuck!”

Henry IV Part 1

Charleston has MVP written all over him, Cobb has blood on his hands after beating on a guy with 1 foot. I like their offense, but then again I also really liked “BJ and The Bear” so you might not want to listen to me. I really like their pitching as well. With that offense the Tide could swing 4-20 game winners. I would tip my hat to you Mr Bacon, but that’s where I hide my butterfly collection. And don’t worry they’re alive, dead butterflies under your hat would be weird.

Terrapins: (Jimmy Keenan)

“Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage.”

As You Like It

The Terrapins won it all last season. They put another fine team on the field again this season, but I don’t think it will be enough in a tough NL. Mackey, Smith, Miller, Youngs, and Pipp will do some damage. Their pitching, on paper looks strong, but it’s an illusion. Just like when David Copperfield made the Statue of Liberty disappear. All done with mirrors, really big ass mirrors!!

Caterpillars: (John Momberg)  

“Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon”

Timon of Athens

It seems like every season this team hovers around the top of the league and then BAM, they’re in the playoffs. They crumble like a 3-year old fortune cookie once they get there, but they may just be tired from all the hovering. I don’t see them hovering this season. Speaker will not disappoint, but Coveleski and Alexander are just shadows of their former selves.

Warbirds: (Adam Graham)

“Villain, I have done thy mother”

Titus Andronicus (It’s funny, cause it’s true.)

Also if you’ve never had the opportunity to watch a production of Titus Andronicus, and you have a weak stomach…….then don’t. It is a blood bath. It is a testament to the most vile aspects of the human condition.

Kind of like when a certain son won’t trade a certain player to a certain father unless that certain father trades away EVERYTHING!!!  

This Warbirds team may be the strongest team this league has ever seen. They are loaded. Not loaded like my old boss who used to keep his “medicine” in a silver flask. This team is stacked. Not stacked like my Aunt Mary from Rochester. Seriously, how was she able to stand? It looked like she was trying to smuggle a small child out of Mexico under her shirt!!  The Warbirds will sweep into the playoffs, and then sweep aside their NL opponent, only to lose in the World Series. (Call it the Cool Papa Bell curse.)

STORM: Tim Deale

 “I’ll beat thee, but I would infect my hands.”

Timon of Athens

Heilmann and Williams will hit their dingers, and Rixey, Vance, and VanGilder will get their wins. They might sneak into the playoffs, but it’s going to be a tough road to hoe.  And if you’ve ever hoed a road you know what I’m talking about.

Dreamers: (David Kuehn)

“Peace, ye fat guts!”

Henry IV

 They improved slightly last season, and should do so again in 1922, but someone has to finish in last place. Grimes and McManus need a little more help on offense. If I had Shocker, Donohue and Pfeffer on the Skeeters I’d run all season with a 3-man rotation.  But I once brushed my teeth with Preparation–H. It didn’t damage my teeth, but my lips shrunk down to the size of dental floss. It sure made for an awkward prom picture.

Warbirds

Crimson Tide

Storm

Terrapins

Aggies

Caterpillars

Dreamers

The Tide beat the Storm, the Warbirds beat the Tide, the Warbirds get swept by the Pines in the World Series. (Let’s chalk that up to the Curse of Cool Papa Bell)

  

                                                          

                                                            

                                                            What could have been!!